Scenes from the Road

Me, my mom, and both the girls went to a wonderful bridal shower this Saturday and got to visit with some family after. It was so much fun!

BUT ... it required ten hours in the car. About eight of those hours were the worst hours I've spent in a car with my girls. When it was bad, it was very bad. But when it wasn't bad, it was funny. So, I have for you -- scenes from the road. 

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My mom: *sniff sniff* "Blowout in the back seat!"
Me: "There's nothing around. Where should I pull over? Oh, wait! An Amish store! Perfect! The Amish are too peaceable to kick us out for changing a baby's poopy diaper in their parking lot."

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Sup?

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Josie: *Skipping out of McDonald's, moments after my mom took her in to use the bathroom* "I have to make pee pee!"
Me: "WHAT? You just went ten seconds ago!"
Josephine: "Mama, that potty -- it flushed itself! With no handle!"
Me: "I see. Do you just want to go back in there because it was fun?"
Josephine: "It flushed itself!"
Me: "Get in the car."

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"Crocheting" a hat like grandma

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Me: "Listen, Josie. Remember that old baby carseat you grew out of that had really tight straps and you hated and you kept begging to be let out of?"
Josephine: "Yeah ... "
Me: "If you get up on your knees in that booster seat one more time, when we get home, I'm going to get that out of the garage, put it back in the car, and make you sit in it until JUNIOR HIGH."
Josephine: *gasp* "Yikes!"
[Editor's note: She totally stood up five minutes later. Future Josephine is going to hate 2.5-year-old Josephine for that choice.]

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Hat complete

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My mom: *after five minutes of frantic searching* "No, seriously, I can't find my phone anywhere! I whipped around to tell Josie to sit down so fast that it flew out of my hand and I can't find it! It's gone! Where can it be?"
Me: "Well, I'm sure we'll find it when we stop. It's probably with the crochet hook you lost earlier."
My mom: "WHERE IS IT? WHERE'S MY PHONE?!?!!? Oh ... it was at the end of the charger cord ..."

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"Give me all the pretty green yarn, grandma, 'cuz I a kitty!"

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Me: "Let's get off here and get some McDonald's. Maybe that will help."
Josephine: "McDonald's will make me feel better."
Me: "Oh yeah?"
Josephine: *wistful sigh* "Yeah. McDonald's will make us all feel better.:.
[Editor's note: It totally did.]

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Oh, sure, she slept. For TEN MINUTES. In the meantime, Genevieve was screaming so hard she got hives all over her face.

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Josephine: "Can I watch Peepin' Booty, mama?"
Me: "Sure."
My mom: *shoots me a puzzled look*
Me: "She means Sleeping Beauty."
My mom: *leans toward me and whispers* "Sounds like a porno!"

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 I'll let you know when we have our next road trip planned so you can come along.