Book Review: The Care and Handling of Roses with Thorns by Margaret Dilloway

I'm sure a few of you thought I was dead or enduring preterm labor, but I have actually been having computer problems (pray for my little gal!) and blogging on my phone just isn't an option -- it's smart, but not that smart. Or I'm not that smart. One or the other. Anyway, I'm busting at the seams with things to tell you, but I had to borrow my mom's laptop and sneak away from my little sweetie to bring you this book review on time, and using someone else's keyboard is in my top five most frustrating endeavors, so I may or may not have time to write all the things I've been dying to write when I'm done with this. We shall see.


What I DO have for you is a review of the novel The Care and Handling of Roses with Thorns
by Margaret Dilloway. I may be the only person who had never heard of Dilloway before this, who knows, so what I got was a nice surprise of a read. 


The Care and Handling of Roses with Thorns tells the story of Galilee Garner, a single high school biology teacher, long-time dialysis patient waiting for new kidneys, rose breeder, and above all, curmudgeon. You definitely think you are reading about a jaded older lady, but you are actually meeting a 36-year-old who is much much older than her biological age and doesn't care one bit. Gal's teenage niece shows up unexpectedly one day, and, as you might expect, her life changes drastically.


My opinion of the book is very easily broken down, really:


What I didn't like: Within the first few pages, Gal says her roses are "Difficult and obstinate. Thriving under a set of specific and limited conditions. That pretty much describes me. Maybe that's why I like these roses so much." I NEVER want to read lines like that. Let me connect the dots myself (especially in this case, because honestly, who WOULDN'T). I also wasn't a HUGE fan of how predictable about 95% of the plot was. After reading the first three chapters, I pretty much had an idea of how the rest of the book would play out, but honestly, that ended up not bothering me at all, and I kept powering through the book, even though I assumed I knew how it would turn out.


What I really liked about the book: The characters! I would find it very hard to believe that someone could read this book and NOT like at least one of the main characters and not also marvel at the beautiful way Dilloway brings ALL of her characters to life, even the "scenery" characters. Like I already said, I had a good idea of how things would play out, but because the characters were so amazing, you wanted to read every little detail about them that you could. I also thought all the details about rose breeding were very interesting. Even more fascinating to me was the fact that Dilloway had gone to such lengths to research and present the information she did. Even if she herself were a rose breeder, it would be a lot of work to organize and get on paper. In addition to that, I went back and re-read a few sections, skipping the parts where Gal is describing the intricacies of what she is doing in her greenhouse, and the book reads just as well, which is great for any reader who decides they love the characters but are over the "rose stuff." It must take a lot of hard work to make the book read just as well both ways, so I applaud Dilloway on that level as well.


What I didn't like about this book was very minor in comparison to what I liked about it. Like I said, if I am unable to put a book down, it's definitely working, since I have become that type of person who, if I roll my eyes and get mad about something in the first few pages, I'm much more apt to put the book down and never return than to press on. The Care and Handling of Roses with Thorns was a nice read that left me thinking about the characters long after I finished the book. Brava!


If you'd like to see what other bloggers in the BlogHer book club had to say about this book, click on over HERE, and if you've read the book yourself, be sure to join the discussions going on there or read a post by Margaret Dilloway. 


I was given a free copy of The Care and Handling of Roses with Thorns and was compensated for this review. All opinions expressed are my own.

Book Review: Into The Darkest Corner

When I first started reading Into the Darkest Corner by Elizabeth Haynes, what (obviously) jumped out at me was the way the book is narrated: there is a dated entry from 2003, then a dated entry from 2007 ... and back and forth and back and forth for the rest of the book. I was like NO. I just can't do this. Set-ups like this generally give me intense rage and make me give up on books. Shockingly, by the third page, I didn't mind anymore, which is a true testament to the story.

The back-and-forth follows the same character, Cathy, leading up to a traumatic event, and following her post-trauma. Since you already have a general idea of what happened to Cathy in 2003, reading the story of her increasingly abusive stalker boyfriend is very tense -- you know something terrible is about to happen, but you don't know when and you don't know how crazy things will get before it happens. In the "post-attack" timeline, you see a shattered woman trying to rebuild her life, but something tells you that you are not just reading a story of overcoming PTSD and OCD -- something else is going to happen to Cathy. But what? It's a nail-biter, to say the least.

It's more than just a suspenseful novel, however. It touches on tough subjects, like abusive relationships, stalkers, and mental illness. It's uncomfortable to read at times, and you will find yourself screaming at Cathy in your head, but you will also put yourself in her shoes and wonder how you would find a way to escape and what you would have the strength to do. At one point the character tackles this idea head-on, saying she always thought women who didn't leave abusive relationships were lying to themselves when they said it wasn't as easy as it seemed to just leave.  

This book is certainly well-written (I often found myself stopping to think how she actually wrote the two separate but complimentary storylines and got everything to match up so well!), it is different, and it is definitely a page-turner. 

If you'd like to read what the other bloggers on this TLC book tour had to say about this book, click HERE for the master schedule. You can also check out the author's website, facebook page, or Twitter account if you'd like. 

I was given a complimentary copy of this book in exchange for this review. I was not compensated, and the opinions expressed are solely my own.

Josephine's Current Favorite Books (22 months)

Oh, how I wish I had had the foresight to do something like this every so often once Josephine became a book lover! I mentioned a few of her current favorites in the Holiday Giving Guide for the Wee Ones, but it was something I should have kept writing down. I am hoping to keep it up from here on out, because it has been so much fun to see which books stay in her "favorites" rotation and the new books that come out of nowhere and must be read ten bazillion times a day. It has been a lot of fun watching her choose her favorites, and I definitely want to remember them! So here we have what is hopefully the first installment in "Josephine's Current Favorite Books!":

Moo Baa La La La by Sandra Boynton

Moo Baa La La La was one of the first books that Josephine "memorized," and she still loves to "read" it to us. Sometime if we're in the car and just say part of the book, she will go off on a big long recitation of all the animal noises in the rest of the book (in order!). She knows what's coming before we even turn the pages. Kills me. My favorite might be her rendition of the three singing pigs who say "La la la!" Love her little La Las.

Don't Let the Pigeon Stay Up Late! by Mo Willems

Don't Let the Pigeon Stay Up Late is one of the books I was all excited about ordering for Christmas, and was CERTAIN she would love. And she does! This is another book she has memorized. It is a "bedtime only book" (we have a stack of books in our bedroom that are half all-time "bedtime only," like Goodnight Moon and half that I rotate in a out. Jeremy picks up a stack and lets her pick which to read that night. This is ALWAYS one of the choices!). My favorite parts of her recitation are when the pigeon shouts "I'M NOT TIRED!" and Josie throws back her head and shouts along, and when the pigeon starts yawning mid-sentence. Josie knows EXACTLY when the yawns are coming, and does a great yawn! There is also a page where the pigeon says, "I know, let's count the stars!" and Josie leans back her head and looks to the sky to count the stars. 

She also loves Don't Let the Pigeon Drive the Bus!and The Pigeon Has Feelings, Too!
 She also has these memorized and will randomly shout one of the lines during the day and then we recite the rest of the book together. It's pretty much the greatest thing ever.

One Drowsy Dragon by Ethan Long

We got One Drowsy Dragon as a first birthday present from an Aunt and Uncle of Jeremy's, and I had never heard of it before we got it. The basic premise is one dragon really wants to sleep while the others are being noisy. Josie seems to like the voice I use for the Drowsy dragon, because I make him really disgruntled. She stares at the book until it's time for the Drowsy Dragon to shout something, then she whips her head around and looks at me and laughs. She has requested this book MULTIPLE times a night (also a "bedtime only" book) for the past few MONTHS.

There's a Wocket in My Pocket! by Dr. Suess

Oh, Dr. Suess. Jeremy loves to tell the story of how I begged him not to read her any Dr. Suess right before bed when she was younger because it got her "riled up." I only wanted him reading sing-songy books to soothe her, but now that she's older, I guess she can handle the zany bouncy rhythms of Suess right before lights out. :) I was shocked the first time she sat all the way through this book (it's LONG!) but she asks for encore performances most nights, and sits quietly listening. Amazing!

How Do I Love You? by Marion Dane Bauer

This is a sappy, rhyming book that I bought Josephine for this past Valentine's Day, and it has made its way into the "bedtime" pile because she was requesting it. She sits very quietly while we read this to her, and I have to admit that I can make it all the way through to the end, but the last page? I choke up every time and have a hard time getting out the last few words ("I love all that you will be and everything you are" SOB). 

But Not the Hippopotamus by Sandra Boynton

The first time I read this book after buying it for Josephine, I was like, Huh. Kids like this? because it is simple and also a little mean (that poor hippopotamus gets left out of EVERYTHING!). The first time I read it to her, however, it was a HUGE hit. The last pages read "Yes! The hippopotamus! ... But not the armadillo" and we have a new left-out animal. For some reason, this is HILARIOUS to her. She loves to recite those two sentences, and her "not the armadillo voice is low and gravely and she shakes her head while saying it, and then she laughs and laughs and laughs. She does it out of nowhere, all the time. In the grocery store, in the bath, you name it; all of a sudden, the hippopotamus and armadillo will pop into her head, and it's all over.

Thanks for taking this very booky journey with me. There are lots more books Josephine loves, but these seem to be our can't-miss hits these days. I love how much she loves them. :)

Happy Friday, Bibliophiles

It really warms my heart that, these days, when I have to assemble my big bag of can't-fail items to keep Josephine happy on a long car ride (which is anything longer than 20 minutes to her, unfortunately), at least 75% of those items I know will make her happy are BOOKS.

Okay, there are also a lot of snacks in there. She is my daughter, after all. And if there's one thing I've learned from monitoring my own behavior having a toddler, it's that if you think you have enough snacks, you DON'T. Pack more. Then pack even more.


But the books, you guys. She loves books. And I love that. 

Book Review: My New American Life by Francine Prose

I'm usually not one to start book reviews with the synopsis from the back of the book, but when it comes to My New American Life by Francine Prose, I almost feel like I have no other choice.

Lula, a twenty-six-year-old Albanian woman living surreptitiously in New York City on an expiring tourist visa, hopes to make a better life for herself in America. When she lands a job as caretaker to Zeke, a rebellious high school senior in suburban New Jersey, it seems that the security, comfort, and happiness of the American dream may finally be within reach. Her new boss, Mister Stanley, an idealistic college professor turned Wall Street executive, assumes that Lula is a destitute refugee of the Balkan wars. He enlists his childhood friend Don Settebello, a hotshot lawyer who prides himself on defending political underdogs, to straighten out Lula's legal situation. In true American fashion, everyone gets what he wants and feels good about it.

But things take a more sinister turn when Lula's Albanian "brothers" show up in a brand-new black Lexus SUV. Hoodie, Leather Jacket, and the Cute One remind her that all Albanians are family, but what they ask of her is no small favor. Lula's new American life suddenly becomes more complicated as she struggles to find her footing as a stranger in a strange new land. Is it possible that her new American life is not so different from her old Albanian one?

Set in the aftermath of 9/11, My New American Life offers a vivid, darkly humorous, bitingly real portrait of a particular moment in history, when a nation's dreams and ideals gave way to a culture of cynicism, lies, and fear. Beneath its high comic surface, the novel is a more serious consideration of immigration, of what it was like to live through the Bush-Cheney years, and of what it means to be an American.

When I finished reading the synopsis, all I could think was "...huh..." and I requested the book, but for the life of me, could not decide what kind of book would be showing up on my doorstep. Luckily, what showed up was a really amazing book.

I don't know about you, but the synopsis confused me, and in the same sense, it is hard to describe what "kind" of book this is. What I can tell you is that the writing is, without a doubt, superb. The characters are beautifully constructed. You will fall in love with the main character by the end of the first paragraph. You will think you know what is going on in the book, and then all of sudden you will get slapped in the face and you will love the shake-up. You will like this book.

Perhaps my favorite thing about the book is the darling eccentricity of the main character, Lula. Her stories about Communist Albania are sometimes true and sometimes complete fabrication. People tend to be more likely to believe the fabrications. She is a wonderful, lying, pessimistic, paranoid person who is also, somehow, pure of heart and the person you find yourself rooting for, no matter what.

After finishing the book, I read part of a review by Michael Dirda of The New York Times Review of Books that stated "With the possible exception of Joyce Carol Oates, there is no busier or more prolific woman of letters in twenty-first-century America than Francine Prose." I felt a little lame for never having heard of her before this after reading that description, but I am a little less connected to the literary world than I have been at other times in my life, so I am going to cut myself a break and do a little catch-up. In the past, I have read books and then said I was going to go out and read everything else by that particular author. Many times, this does not come to fruition, or does not happen for many years. In this case, I have already requested some of her fiction and non-fiction from my library (Goldengrove, A Changed Man, The Lives of the Muses: Nine Women & the Artists They Inspired, and Blue Angel).

This book is like nothing I've read, and was truly fun to read. It was even one of those books where the last line of the book makes you smile and read it over and over again. I promise you won't be disappointed if you check out Francine Prose.

If you'd like to see what other bloggers on the tour had to say about this book, you can click HERE for the main schedule of reviews.

I was given a copy of this book by TLC Book Tours, but was not compensated in any way for this review. All opinions expressed are entirely my own.

UPDATED WITH WINNER: Book Review: Make it Stay by Joan Frank (and GIVEAWAY!)

Make It Stay by Joan Frank is definitely different than what I have been reading lately -- in a good way. The plot revolves around a couple, and a majority of the story takes place while they are preparing for a dinner party and the husband explains the backstory of another couple (his best friend and his wife). 

To have almost an entire book unfold in an hour's time, yet follow years and years of events was unique. What was also unique about the book is that you could feel you know everything about both of these couples by the end of the book, yet you only read a little over 150 pages. The world Joan Frank creates is interesting, complicated, and full of twists and turns, but she doesn't need the now-customary 400+ pages to accomplish this feat.

You probably won't like all the characters by the time the book winds to a close, but I don't like a lot of people in real life. That makes the book all the more real -- who doesn't have a friend or a spouse's friend who really isn't the most wholesome individual or has made some life choices you wouldn't make yourself? But you're probably still friends with him or her, right? Not everyone's an angel, and relationships are complicated. So it goes in Make it Stay. 

Frank's writing style is also unique and lyrical. Her language is poetic and at times heartbreaking, and you find yourself caught up in long, winding sentences that evoke such vivid images that you can't break away. I wouldn't describe it as a light and fluffy beach-read, but it's also not a hoighty-toighty book that takes itself too seriously. It's deep without being pretentious and a quick read without being fluff, and that is hard to come by. 

***THIS GIVEAWAY IS NOW CLOSED***

And now, a BONUS for all those who made it to the end of the review! I have ONE COPY of this book to give to one of my lucky readers! 

To be considered for the giveaway, simply leave a comment on this post and tell me the last book you read and your e-mail address so I can contact you for your shipping address. 

I'll use a random number generator to choose the winner and the book will be shipped to you by the publisher. I'll announce the winner on Monday, May 28th. Good luck!

If you'd like to read what other hosts on the TLC book tour had to say about this book, click HERE to see the schedule of reviews. If you'd like to learn more about the author, click HERE for Joan Frank's website.

I was provided a copy of this book but was not compensated for this review. All opinions expressed are my own.


UPDATE (5/29/2011): And now for the winner! I used random.org's random number generator, and skipping over a double comment and the comment from a TLC representative, I had six entries.


DRUM ROLL, please.


The winner was ....

Number 4, or Jill! Congrats, Jill! I have sent you an e-mail to get your mailing address. 

It's a Booky Kind of Day!

First up: I have a review of a fantastic book up for the BlogHer Book Club.  Here's a little teaser to get you to click on over:


Tana French sets her latest mystery novel, Faithful Place, in some less-than-desirable areas of modern Dublin, and yet, somehow, reading the book made me want to pack up and move there immediately.  


To read the rest, click HERE.


To top it all off, Josephine got a ton of books today.  Using a Barnes & Noble gift card she got for her birthday, we got all these:


Bath Time! (Sandra Boynton)
No More Monsters for Me! (Peggy Parish)
Little Miss Sunshine (Roger Hangreaves)
My First 100 Words
First Words: 100 Animals


Yay!


I hope you are having a booky kind of day, too!  

Book Review of The Kid and a Tantalizing Offer

A few weeks ago, Penguin Publishing sent me a copy of Sapphire's new book, The Kid, to read and review through the BlogHer Book Club.  Remember Push, the book made into the film Precious?  This book follows the life of Precious' son.


You can find my review HERE, and lots of other reviews HERE.


ALSO -- Jeremy does an awesome "PRECIOUS!" shout (like Monique does in the film).  If I get at least fifteen comments on this post asking for it, I will take a video of Jeremy shouting and post it here.  

Book Review: Getting to Happy

My latest book review for the BlogHer Book Club is live!  

Confession: I never read Waiting to Exhale, but when I was offered a copy of the sequel, Getting to Happy, to review, I didn’t hesitate. In fact, I had never even read anything by Terry McMillan before (despite the fact that she once lived about 30 miles from my hometown, and was a PRETTY big deal in the thumb of Michigan) ...

to read the rest of my review (and see other reviews), click HERE

A Discovery of Witches Book Review

I recently got sent another great book to review for the BlogHer book club, and the review is live today.


Here's what I had to say:


A Discovery of Witches by Deborah Harkness is like a combination of Harry Potter, Twilight, The DaVinci Code, a thriller, and a good romance novel. With all the new spins on witches and vampires out there, it was interesting to read a version obviously written for an adult audience (no offense to J. K. Rowling or Stephenie Meyers!) and one that was so inextricably entwined in the rich worlds of academia and history ...


Click HERE to read the rest and see what others had to say!

Book Review: Girl in Translation

Amazing, inspiring, moving, intense, breathtaking -- there are not enough adjectives for this book. It might sound like I am exaggerating, but Girl in Translation by Jean Kwok is one of the best books I have read in years.

Want to read more?  Click HERE.  Tee-hee.  I am such a tease.  Head on over to BlogHer to read my review and many others (well, you can read the others, I GUESS, but do NOT tell me if you like someone else's better.  Got it?  Good.  Love you.)


Link to my review: http://www.blogher.com/girl-translation-mustread?from=bookclub


Link to all reviews for Girl in Translation: http://www.blogher.com/now-reading-girl-translation

Josephine's Books

I added a new tab up above and a lovely picture on the right sidebar 

it looks like this!

because I need your help, dearest Internet friends.


I already have an excitingly-large number of books for my darling daughter, but I know there are oh-so-many more I NEED.  Some of these books I already know I need, but others?  I might not even know they exist yet!  This is where you come in.  Please, please, take a moment to let me know the books I need to provide for my daughter.  If you click the "Josephine's Books" tab above or the lovely picture to the right or even the picture above!), you will see the current list of books we own.  Leave me a comment with any suggestions you might have.


Thank you in advance, loyal readers!  What would I do without you?


XOXO,


Veronica

Book Review: I am Hutterite AND Giveaway!!

Booksneeze.com sent me a copy of Mary-Ann Kirkby's I am Hutterite to read and review, and I must say, I was pleasantly surprised.

I adore memoirs, but you never really can tell ... I mean, it seems like everyone is writing their memoir these days, and you have to figure that not ALL of them have the most interesting things to say and it is hard to be a "good" writer.

Anyway, I wasn't disappointed with Mary-Ann Kirkby's tale.  Mary-Ann grew up in a religious sect called the Hutterites, which is a branch of Anabaptists who, like the Amish and Mennonites, trace their roots to the Radical Reformation of the 16th century.  The Hutterites embrace community living, absolute pacifism, and living as much like their ancestors would have in 16th century Europe.  Since the Hutterites moved to North America in the 18th and 19th centuries, their population grew from 400 to around 42,000.  Today Hutterites are found in the provinces of Manitoba, Saskatchewan, Alberta, and British Colombia, and in the US they reside in North and South Dakota, Minnesota, Washington and Montana.

The book started off a little shaky, and I really couldn't hear Mary-Ann's voice, as she began by telling her mother's story, but it soon picks up, and I was engrossed.  She begins with her father and mother meeting and getting married, followed by her "charmed" community life, and finally being moved out of the community and facing the "English" world.

While at times the first half is hard to read with all the Hutterisch phrases (which are sometimes followed by and English translation and sometimes NOT), the story keeps you going.  I had a real attachment to Mary-Ann by the second half of the book, and my heart broke as she struggled to fit in at school.  My only other complaint is that the book is so careful and slow and detailed, but then it just ENDS.  She's in the middle of a narrative, and then, BAM, epilogue.  I guess it's hard to end a memoir when you went on living for so long after the part you need to tell ends, but it rubbed me the wrong way.

Overall, I would definitely recommend it.  In fact, one of you lucky bitches or bastards could have this book show up in your mailbox compliments of ME!  Here's the deal: since religious sects are usually seen as cults (not to say that the Hutterites are a cult, but you get what I mean!), to enter this giveaway, respond in the comments section with why YOU would be a great cult leader.  The best answer WINS!  Just be sure to leave your e-mail address so I can contact you and get your mailing address.

YAY!  A giveaway!  I must be like, the nicest person on the planet.  Or something.

Book Review: Why You Say It by Webb Garrison

Why You Say It: The Fascinating Stories Behind Over 600 Words and Phrases, by Webb Garrison

I am reviewing this book that was given to me by Book Sneeze (see link on the right bottom of page), and the cover sold me.  Rubber duckies and word bubbles?  Loves it.  Also, I was promised KNOWLEDGE.  

This book was definitely a departure for me, since I have been on a novel binge lately, but it was an interesting read, to be sure.  If you are also a novel-reader, this is definitely a different type of pace, but Garrison does his best to make it less like a dictionary or encyclopedia and more like a novel with his chapters.  Garrison separates the stories behind the words and phrases into chapters like "The World of Entertainment," "The Great Outdoors," and "Making Fun of Others"  (tee hee!).

While at times I found myself skimming through some of the words or phrases I had never even heard of, and I definitely began skipping the first paragraph of every explanation (which was simply saying "Hey.  Has anyone ever said this to you?"), some of the stories really were fascinating!  

For example, did you know that the word "limelight" (which I LOVE) came from the fact that the first spotlights were made by heating up LIMES?  If facts like that make your day, or you are the kind of person who likes to share those little ditties with others at parties or staff meetings, then this book is for you!

While it is not my favorite book, it was a good read, so I give it a solid C rating.

Book Review

New book review up at The Bibliophile Review (warning ... it involves Twilight!)

Things that Make Me Cry ... and Not Just on the Inside ...

... but on the outside.  Like, tears running down my face. 

For real.

All of the following things are horrible, wretched inventions that have come about due to the "advancements" in technology. 

I know, some of you are probably furrowing your brows and thinking Ummm, Veronica, obviously you L-O-V-E technology, what with your addiction to Facebook and TV, the writing of the blog nonsense, and using of the cell phone and whatnot.  

Yes, whatever, I LOVE technology.  I do.  I could weep when I imagine my life without Google, and how much harder teaching would be if I didn't have CNN and Yahoo! homepages to show me interesting articles that relate to what I am talking about that day that I can print out and disitribute in about 30 seconds flat.  And life without Television?  I know there are some people who happily CHOOSE this lifestyle, but even if I become a bum living in a cardboard box, I will still sneak into stores to watch my stories.

So why am I writing a blog about the horror of technology?  Read on, my friends ...

Well, first of all, because THIS exists:

{source}

Yes, a "OMG" necklace so you don't have to type or say "OMG" to people, you can say it to them all the live-long day, and in Cubic Zirconium to boot!  The description is hard to read, but it says "OMG this pendant is sooooooo cute!  This acronym for the phrase 'Oh My God' got its start years ago on IM and has become a common term used in everyday conversation.  If OMG is one of the terms you use every day, then you have to get this cz pendant.  Wear this sterling silver cz chat pendant and people are sure to say 'OMG I have to get one too!'"

All I can say is ... O. M. G.

Next up on my list:  We all know that GPS has led to tracking devices of all sorts, and the first to shock and disgust me was the "Disney" tracking system for your children (the commercial shows parents smiling at a laptop that has a small Mickey head moving around on a map of their town.  Wow.), but now that it is such a cheap and common technology, ads like this began popping up on my Facebook page:

Of course, after I listed myself as "married," the ads changed to "Is your husband cheating?" 

Clever facebook bastards.

And, next up, technology has made life so much easier in the fact that one does not have to READ an entire silly book to get the plot.  Especially those ridiculous classics, like Romeo and Juliet, Hamlet, or Pride and Prejudice.  Who would want to READ when they could get literature's "gr8 txts" edited for the mobile generation?

The service sends text messages to students who want a condensed version of great texts, like this gem: "FeudTween2hses--Montague&Capulet. RomeoM falls_<3w/_JulietC@mary Secretly Bt R kils J's Coz&isbanishd. J fakes Death. As Part of Plan2b-w/R Bt_leter Bt It Nvr Reachs Him. Evry1confuzd---bothLuvrs kil Emselves."

 Yep, that's the plot of Romeo and Juliet, and apparently that is all you need to get from that dusty tome.  And this service claims it is providing an "understanding" of literature's classics. 

And finally, the piece de resistance, the worst of the worst.  You may have already heard of this by now.  Especially if you are on the English faculty mailing list at work, because if you are, I already sent you the article and encouraged you to be disgusted by it.  For those of you who are not forced to receive e-mails from me at work, let me tell you about the New England prep school that GAVE AWAY ALL THE BOOKS IN THEIR LIBRARY.

Voluntarily.  On purpose.  Over 20,000 books.  Gone.

The headmaster of the school explains "When I look at books, I see an outdated technology, like scrolls before books."  Clearly the same.

So, instead of ADDING digital readers and computers to the library (I'm sorry, it has been re-named the "learning center" since it doesn't have any books to make it fit the definition of a library.), they moved out the books and spent 500,000 smackers to move in technology -- and a $50,000 coffee shop that will include a $12,000 cappuccino machine.  I mean, it IS a PREP school, after all.

It boggles the mind.  I mean, this is an ADULT who made this decision.  Did he never get over that black-or-white, all-or-nothing stage in life?  The only options are not ALL books or NO books.

I would love comments on these abominations, but especially on the doing away with books.  What is it that you get from a book that you could never get from a computer screen?

Obsession(s)

Okay, so anyone who knows me knows that I might have an obsessive personality. When I find something I like, it quickly turns to love, then, of course, even more quickly to an obsession. Luckily, I get over these obsessions, or I would still be obsessed with Mousercize, My Little Ponies, Rainbow Brite, and Strawberry Shortcake in addition to all of the thousands of obsessions over the years.

So, what follows is a list of my most recent obsessions and why I have become infatuated with said items/people:

1. Augusten Burroughs: I put off reading Running with Scissors for many years because, as snooty as it sounds, I often question books that are instant bestsellers and made into movies in no time flat. I have been proven wrong. I read Running with Scissors and liked it, so my helpful friend Jess gave me all five of his other books (four more memoirs and a novel).

What I was not expecting was that I would LOVE LOVE LOVE his other books. My three favorite are definitely Possible Side Effects, Magical Thinking, and Sellevision. So, naturally, I started stalking him. I went to his website, and googled him to read all the many articles that have been written about him. Through this, I found that the family he wrote about in Running with Scissors is suing him because, essentially, they claim that while they ARE crazy, they are not AS crazy as he made them out to be. Lame. Reading his blog also led me to my next obsession:

2. Reading memoirs: From stalking Augusten Xon Burroughs (yeah, I know his middle name and I know that his real name is Christopher Robison. Sad, but true.), I learned that his best friend is also an author who has had two memoirs published. So, I went and bought A Girl Named Zippy by Haven Kimmel. Oh. My. God. I read it in one day. So I ran back and got her second memoir, She Got Up Off the Couch. Both are written in the voice of a young, sassy, unpredictable girl. I love that little girl. THEN I learned that Augusten Burroughs' brother, John Elder Robison, published a memoir about not being diagnosed with Asperger's until he was 40. Look Me in the Eye was awesome as well, and I was officially hooked on memoirs.

So, I was strolling through Schuler books the other day, and, lo and behold, they are making a new section to house their expanding memoir collection, and I found another great memoir: My Lobotomy by Howard Dully. Talk about heart-wrenching. This book is about a boy who had a totally unnecessary lobotomy when he was TWELVE years old. In his forties he decided to do some research to try to discover why and how this could have happened to him. A great read. And just when I thought my memoir obsession was losing steam, I got another lead in an interesting place.

3. Beautiful People / Simon Doonan: I was flipping through the cable TV guide, and I saw that a show called Beautiful People, produced by BBC2, was about to come on. I love those crazy Brits, especially the funny ones, so I turned it on. Words cannot express the hilarity of this show. It is about a slightly fey (light-in-the-loafers type fellow) window dresser for Barney's New York remembering his childhood as a slightly fey boy growing up in the 90s in dreary old England. And, of course, he has fantastically crazy family and a lovely accent, and I love him.

I watched the credits and learned that the show was based on Simon Doonan's memoir Beautiful People: My Family and Other Glamorous Varmits, so in a matter of moments, I snatched the book up and devoured it in a day and a half. I might be slow on the uptake, but it turns out Simon Doonan is the artistic director for Barney's New York, and he is the fabulous and flamboyant talking head who regularly appears on VH1 programs to say hilarious, snarky things while adorned in a loud, garish outfit. I love him!!!!

And yes, my friends, all of these books are available to borrow! :)