Saturday, December 11, 2010

Growth Spurt

Okay, here's the deal:  My baby is GROWING.  Yeah, I know, they are totally supposed to do that, but not like this. NOT LIKE THIS!!!!  She is growing much too quickly.


Here is the evidence:


"Oh, hi.  Don't mind me, I'll just be sitting here wearing my SIX MONTH clothes on my FOUR-MONTH birthday.  No biggie."
Yeah, I unwrapped one of her Christmas presents to have a cute outfit that was big enough for her to wear.  No worries, I'll re-wrap it and take pictures of her opening it.  What?  She's a BABY.  She'll never know the difference.

Anyway, I blame the growing on her father, who doesn't understand just how terrible it is that she is growing up too quickly.  Look at him, feeding her SOLIDS and convincing her they are good for her. 
Look at that "yum" face she is making.  She has clearly been brainwashed.


More evidence:  ALL of these clothes fit THREE DAYS AGO.  
You should have seen me in there, sorting clothes and crying.  Josephine just laid in the floor and looked up at me, laughing every now and again. Then she rolled over, for good measure, to remind me how she's not a BABY anymore, but a GIRL.


Don't worry, I paid her back by trying on a few of her three-month outfits that I wasn't ready to part with.
"Give it up, Mom."

I tried really hard to make them fit.  Confession:  I also took her out in public like this.  Then I came home, cried, and put the onesie in the bin of "too-small baby clothes" that is now overflowing.


My final piece of evidence:  Comparison photos.  Yeah, I went there.
Now, you tell me that she's not growing too quickly.  Try it.  Doesn't she look like a freakin' three-year-old compared to the first picture?  The pediatrician claims she is in the 75th percentile for height and weight, but I have a sneaking suspicion she is lying to me to keep the rage at bay.  Just a hunch.

I tried talking to my sensitive husband about my feelings regarding the loss of my newborn baby. Here's how it went (hint: not well).

Veronica:  JEREMY!  Just LOOK at her!!  She is huge!  Why is she growing?  Why?  WHY?
Jeremy:  You can't halt progress, Veronica.
Veronica: *death glare*
Jeremy: *runs from room*

On a final (unrelated) note, let me leave you with ... BABY MOHAWK!
I love my giant grown-up baby.

6 comments:

  1. Babies grow SO fast - my niece is already two, and I want to cry, she's so big and walking and it's INSANE!

    Love the hawk, btw. Very stylish.

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  2. If it makes you feel any better, my cousin's 11 month old baby is much bigger than her three year old daughter! Josephine is way ahead of her peers in the cool factor with her mohawk.

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  3. Well Jackson grew two shoes sizes over night about 6 months ago. That sucks. Olivia grew 2 inches over two days and that means all of her new school pants no longer fit. Awesomeballs.

    But when they were babies... Olivia was in 9 month clothes by the time she was 4 months old. It was HORRIBLE. By 6 months it was 12 or 18 month clothes. NOW.. I can't find pants to fit her- she's really tall and has no waist/hips. Everything (no matter how much I adjust the waist, or pull a belt really tight) will inevitably fall off. It's horrible. She has permanent plumber butt at age 5. Sad day.

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  4. I love everything about the mohawk picture! The hair, the expression, the outfit-priceless!

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  5. omg baby mohawk is too cute.

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