Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Story Postponed; Baby Stuff Continued

My apologies to everyone who does not care about pacifiers and baby-wearing.  My double-apologies to all who were desperately awaiting the story about my verified enemy (or enemIES -- who knows).  BUT, I have gotten a lot of great feedback and questions from people about not only the pacifier situation (OMG, I just imagined "The Situation" with a pacifier in his mouth.  Ha!) but also my "unable-to-put-my-child-down-for-more-than-five-minutes" problem.

So, in response to all the suggestions and questions, I have some facts to share:

1.  I have tried ALL available types of pacifiers, I only offered each type to her once each, and I only offered them to her because she recently started frantically sucking her hands and fingers in order to soothe herself, but while sucking she would still cry and hyperventilate, like she was trying desperately to soothe herself and could not manage it.

2.  When I gave her the pacifier she liked, she INSTANTLY started sucking like gangbusters, a smile came over her face, and she actually RELAXED, which she doesn't do for too many hours a day.

3.  So, she obviously loves the thing, but her little tongue pushes the thing out, and as soon as she pushes it out, she screams and cries because it is gone.

4.  Yes, I also have a hard time breastfeeding, because it always feels like she is pushing it out of her mouth, AND it hurts like the devil is biting my nips the ENTIRE time she eats, every time she eats (but she has a deep enough latch, she is not just shallow).  

5.  As for the baby-wearing, I am ALL for it and planned on doing it from the get-go.  I tried the sling first, and she was like no way, Jose, so I got a Baby Bjorn.  She LOVES the Bjorn ... IF I am in constant motion.  Like, when I walk the dog or go to the store, she is in hog heaven and passes out, but if I have to (heaven forbid) stop moving because I have to wait in line for a prescription or go in the house to make dinner, she spazzes.  

6.  For the most part, she FUH-reaks when I put her down for more than 5 minutes, and I don't mean like slightly upset, I mean apocalypse stuff.  

7.  She is only 2 1/2 months old, so I am nowhere near letting her cry it out.  I'm just not ready.  Plus, everything I've read says it is not a good idea before 4 months.  I still want to be her source of comfort, even if that means constant back pain, no sleep, and slight brain pain.  I mean, I know a lot of people who had high-needs babies, and they started to turn a corner around 3 or 4 months, so until I get to that point, I feel like I should just wait it out for a while longer.

So, have at it, moms!  :D  I love your advice, stories, and "been-there"s.

11 comments:

  1. The Mommy Rock! It's a hip swing that you do while your feet are still but your baby wants to keep moving. I bet your mom can show you. Once you learn it, you will rock armloads of books and other inanimate objects just because that's what you DO.....

    ReplyDelete
  2. two words...

    Duck Tape

    Place good pacifier in her mouth and duck tape it in place.

    Problem solved.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Using a baby swing has always worked wonders with the kiddos I've put in it.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Have you had her tongue checked for tongue tie? Sounds horrible, but it is really easily fixed if it is the problem and it would make a world of difference. I had a friend whose baby had it, and it took a little snip and she was a new baby. Could suck on bottle, breast and dummy. Might be worth getting checked :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Totally agree with Salome Ellen. The Mommy Rock will become ingrained in you so much, that you will start rocking just SEEING a baby.

    Re: Josephine hating the sling.. was it a pocket sling? Where she was laying down? Little known/shared babywearing truth is that most small babies HATE laying down in the sling! It seems so perfect, but kids hate it. If you still have a sling, try doing tummy-to-tummy with her, like how she is in the Bjorn. Usually you can get a baby more secured to you in a sling, and combine that with The Mommy Rock can be an instant soothing technique!

    http://wearyourbaby.com/ was a major major help to me when my 3-year-old was small.

    And it could just be a phase. :/ You will come to HATE THAT SAYING, because every day = new phase of something that you want to solve! Kids change week to week, and it's a joy and terror when you figure out they have, haha.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I'm not sure where you live and what the baby-stuff-resale scene is like there, but I'm in Portland and it's FANTASTIC---we buy my goddaughter's entire life at those stores. Generally the staff are all really kind and understanding, too. If I were you I'd take Josephine to one (or three or seven) of those and try on every sling/wrap they have at the moment, and see if she likes any of them any better.

    Once I nannied for a baby who only stopped crying when he was strapped into his carseat and the carseat was on top of the dryer (tumbling, with the heat off).

    My goddaughter hates the carseat, and only stops screaming in the car if we blast The Decemberists' "The Crane Wife."

    Sheesh.

    Good luck finding that One Thing that works for Josephine. You will do it. It sounds like you are doing a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful job so far. (Your description of your emotional upset when you kept combing her hair even though she was making a Sad Face choked me up. So sweet.)

    Props,

    Some Girl Who Started Reading Your Webpage Back When You Were Allie's Internet Girlfriend and Then Asked VERY SERIOUS About Baby Names Wo Ho Ho That Was Funny

    ReplyDelete
  7. Salome Ellen -- Yeah, I rock ... she cries. Or pulls my hair. Or makes the saddest of sad faces. Sometimes it works, though!

    Ed -- someone told me that was illegal. I'll have to do some more research.

    Kayla -- she totally dug her swing .. for like a week. Now *sometimes* I can put her in there for five minutes when she is in JUST the right mood and I just want to put clothes in the dryer.

    Toni -- I guess maybe I should, because you are the second person to suggest it. It's weird, because she has always been super interested in her tongue, and is always sticking it out. Would she be able to do that if she were tongue-tied? Or is it unrelated?

    Anna -- Yeah, the guide that came with my swing suggested the lying down position, and she HATED it. And, I do hate the "phase" thing, but I really hope that's what it is. REALLY really.

    Lacey -- Hey girl! I totally know you! In an Internet kind of way. Unfortunately, I have tried all kinds of baby-wearing techniques, and she only likes them if I am constantly moving. If I slow down or stop to let the dog sniff a hydrant, she loses her s***.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Have you tried a vibrating bouncy seat instead of the swing? My son was probably around 5 or 6 months old before he liked the swing, but loved the vibrating seat almost instantly. And you can bounce it a bit with your foot to keep her moving & your hands free.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Salome Ellen -- Yeah, I rock ... she cries. Or pulls my hair. Or makes the saddest of sad faces. Sometimes it works, though!

    Ed -- someone told me that was illegal. I'll have to do some more research.

    Kayla -- she totally dug her swing .. for like a week. Now *sometimes* I can put her in there for five minutes when she is in JUST the right mood and I just want to put clothes in the dryer.

    Toni -- I guess maybe I should, because you are the second person to suggest it. It's weird, because she has always been super interested in her tongue, and is always sticking it out. Would she be able to do that if she were tongue-tied? Or is it unrelated?

    Anna -- Yeah, the guide that came with my swing suggested the lying down position, and she HATED it. And, I do hate the "phase" thing, but I really hope that's what it is. REALLY really.

    Lacey -- Hey girl! I totally know you! In an Internet kind of way. Unfortunately, I have tried all kinds of baby-wearing techniques, and she only likes them if I am constantly moving. If I slow down or stop to let the dog sniff a hydrant, she loses her s***.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I'm not sure where you live and what the baby-stuff-resale scene is like there, but I'm in Portland and it's FANTASTIC---we buy my goddaughter's entire life at those stores. Generally the staff are all really kind and understanding, too. If I were you I'd take Josephine to one (or three or seven) of those and try on every sling/wrap they have at the moment, and see if she likes any of them any better.

    Once I nannied for a baby who only stopped crying when he was strapped into his carseat and the carseat was on top of the dryer (tumbling, with the heat off).

    My goddaughter hates the carseat, and only stops screaming in the car if we blast The Decemberists' "The Crane Wife."

    Sheesh.

    Good luck finding that One Thing that works for Josephine. You will do it. It sounds like you are doing a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful job so far. (Your description of your emotional upset when you kept combing her hair even though she was making a Sad Face choked me up. So sweet.)

    Props,

    Some Girl Who Started Reading Your Webpage Back When You Were Allie's Internet Girlfriend and Then Asked VERY SERIOUS About Baby Names Wo Ho Ho That Was Funny

    ReplyDelete
  11. Totally agree with Salome Ellen. The Mommy Rock will become ingrained in you so much, that you will start rocking just SEEING a baby.

    Re: Josephine hating the sling.. was it a pocket sling? Where she was laying down? Little known/shared babywearing truth is that most small babies HATE laying down in the sling! It seems so perfect, but kids hate it. If you still have a sling, try doing tummy-to-tummy with her, like how she is in the Bjorn. Usually you can get a baby more secured to you in a sling, and combine that with The Mommy Rock can be an instant soothing technique!

    http://wearyourbaby.com/ was a major major help to me when my 3-year-old was small.

    And it could just be a phase. :/ You will come to HATE THAT SAYING, because every day = new phase of something that you want to solve! Kids change week to week, and it's a joy and terror when you figure out they have, haha.

    ReplyDelete

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