Friday, June 24, 2011


Oh my god.  Oh my god.  OH.  MY.  GAWD.  *Tries to collect self*  Okay, so it's like this:  The people who know me and my spawn in real life know a bit more of the details of the sleepless life of my little firecracker of a child, so they will definitely be more impressed with this HUGE win, but trust me, this is ... what's bigger than huge?  Enormous?  Gigantic?  Magical?  Yes, maybe it was magic.  

I've told you a few times about our baby who resists things that are necessary, and then I celebrated a slight respite in the sleeplessness, but I've not truly admitted the extent of my willful child's resistance to the land of nod that I soooooo desire to visit more frequently.  Here's the gist:  THE CHILD DOES NOT SLEEP.  Like, for the past few days, in the most horrific moments of our sleep struggle, she had ONE TEN-MINUTE NAP.  ALL DAY.  She sleeps at night (in four-hour intervals), but during the day?  No way, mom!  I'm no baby!!!  I try to make myself feel better by reasoning that she still ALWAYS gets between 12.5 and 14 hours of sleep a day, she just doesn't want to sleep when she doesn't think she should be sleeping.  Plus, didn't Einstein sleep in four-hour intervals?  Even if he didn't, that's my story and I'm stickin' to it.

So, let me get to the win, shall I?  Brace yourself.  Thins morning my child took ... a THREE-HOUR NAP ... IN HER CRIB!!!!!  Seriously.  I was convinced something was wrong with my clocks or someone was punking me.  But no, the morning nap that she began boycotting at about the four-month mark, was in MY win column instead of that stinker of a baby.

About now some of you might be thinking, But Veronica, motherhood is not about winning!  You are being inappropriate and slightly offensive.  To this, I say NAY.  Motherhood is ALL about winning, because if *I* am winning, then *she* is winning.  As I type this, she is quietly playing with her toys, happy as a flippin' clam.  So when I win, the world damn world wins.  

And now, if she never takes a nap ever again, I will have this to look back on fondly and be able to remember this one magical day where my baby slept like other babies.  Truly a magical day.  Now I shall go and enjoy it.


  1. I hate to kill the fun. But.. I'm not if not honest. If your baby is anything like my Olivia... say goodbye to normal sleep. Olivia, who'll be 6 in September, does not sleep. I believe she is a genetic mutant and not really my spawn. I require a minimum of 12 hours of sleep every night to feel like a functioning human, yet Olivia requires none. She never did the nap thing as a kid and I figured, well... as long as she sleeps all night I'm fine. Yeah. That's all swell until she was 3 and decided that sleeping at night was for punks. This kid is up all night, she'll sleep in one or two hour intervals, but for hte most part, she's up reading, playing, WHATEVER. But our rule is that she stays in her room. No roaming the house, no waking people up. But yeah. Good luck, man. Good luck.

  2. A sleeping baby is a wonderful thing.

  3. Oh Motherhood is sooo about winning! As you described the three hour nap, I fist pumped you...ok, you didn't feel it, but mentally, I was! Hope there are many more naps to come!

  4. Sandra -- I am so glad you are with me on this one! FTW! :)

  5. Oh Sara, I know I can always count on you to be honest! :) Yeah, I am a non-sleeper and she is too. Some days she takes naps, others ... not so much. She is the most unpredictable kid. My mom got out my baby book, and after she went back to work, there is a note saying our day care lady called me "The Baby With No Schedule." Karma. And you? 12 hours of sleep??? Hahahaahahaaaa! Funny lady. :)


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