Friday, March 18, 2011

St. Patrick's Day Fail

I had the distinct pleasure of working last night.  Teaching a night class.  On St. Patrick's Day. Meaning, I had to teach college students who would much rather be out drinking AND then drive home with all the people who had hit up one (or more) bars and were heading to another.

Note to the driver I encountered while trying to get home:  Driving THIRTY MILES under the speed limit does NOT make you less conspicuous to law enforcement.  In fact, I'd go as far as saying it makes you MORE conspicuous.  Especially when you are inching along and a string of more than ten cars is stuck behind you, unable to pass.  This is conspicuous.  I promise.

Anyway, on the way home from work, I stopped at Meijer to grab some Guinness for me and Jeremy and a big honking dog bone for Cleo, who just happened to be the birthday dog yesterday.


Here's what I learned from that little expedition.  You know how these days if you use your credit or debit cards at grocery stores they collect data about you and print off coupons they think you'd like based on your previous purchases?  Well, usually they are right on.  Last time I got a coupon for baby rice cereal.  Helpful.  I will use that coupon.  Last night, on the other hand, Meijer chose to make two rather bold assumptions about me based on the fact that I was purchasing 4 beers and a dog bone late at night instead of painting the town red on one of the biggest "party days" of the year.

#1.  You are a crazy cat lady.

Okay, so I OWN a cat.  You got me there.  And you figured it out even though I have never purchased cat products at your establishment AND I bought a dog bone.

Yes, some cat people are "crazy."  And I have been described that way.  But if you think you can make me feel bad about not being out drinking on St. Patrick's Day by insinuating that I would rather be home with my cats?  Well ... you'd be somewhat right.  

But assumption #2?  Oh boy.

Burn Meijer.  Big burn.

But, I might consider trying that brand of cat litter.

1 comment:

  1. Oh man, I would take that Benefiber coupon off your hands but, alas, there is no Gainesville area Meijer at which to use it.

    Also, you should be careful when switching cat litter. I have a feeling Mojo is picky.

    And finally, I was at Target the other day and the coupon I got with my receipt was for DIAPERS. I was pissed. Anyway, I gave it to the lady behind me. She had a really drooly baby with her and I figured she could use some extra diapers... you know... to sop up some of that drool.


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