Friday, January 8, 2010

Never Underestimate a Pregnant Lady

The Smoking Gun just posted an article about a woman who freaked out at a McDonal's drive-thru because she was told dinner food is not served after 2:30 AM and she could not get the Chicken McNuggets she wanted.


Okay, first of all -- did anyone else know this?  Because I sure didn't.  I do a lot of driving and late night traveling, and sometimes I hit a drive-thru for some Diet Coke and something gross like a McNugget so I can power through the rest of the night.  If I had been denied, I too might be angry.  


Then again, there aren't too many things I love more than an Egg McMuffin, so I could have adjusted.  Moving on.



Okay, so Meldoi Dushane was not happy when she could not get her McNuggets.  She was so angry that she punched the drive-thru attendant in the face, fought with the manager through the window, and then when they closed the window to call the police, she punched through it.


The Smoking Gun is over there acting like she is a crazy lady, that no normal person would behave in that fashion.  


FALSE.


Clearly, this woman in pregnant.  Let me break it down for you:


FACT 1:  She went to the drive-thru window looking for "lean" protein.  Yeah, the nuggets are fried, but they aren't red meat.  Everyone knows that a nauseated preggo needs protein to calm the sea of angry waves in her stomach.  Plus, protein is good for the baby.  So, she was actually being a GOOD mother.


FACT 2:  She needed McNuggets and ONLY McNuggets.  Some people might not understand the whole craving thing, but by god, those cravings are real and severe and intense and horrific.  Sometimes there is ONE thing you want, nay, need, and if you don't get it, you might kill someone.  Also, you might not eat for the rest of the day, and that is negligent parenting.  You can't grow a baby without food.  That's a scientific fact.


FACT 3:  Hormones.  Hormones, hormones, hormones.  Those bitches will MESS YOU UP when you are pregnant, and they will drive you to do and say crazy things.  This isn't a repeat offender we have here.  So she is clearly not full-time crazy.  Just pregnant crazy.


FACT 4:  When she was denied her beloved McNuggets, she didn't just yell.  She utilized her crazy mother strength by punching through the window.  This was clearly the strength of a pregnant woman trying to provide for her embryo or fetus.


So, Smoking Gun, the next time you want to make fun of a lady, be sure she isn't knocked up.  Because she might come for YOU next.  I would suggest stock-piling some nuggets.

12 comments:

  1. And who could blame her? Pregnant women should have extra rights because pregnancy blows.

    ReplyDelete
  2. You don't have to be pregnant to be pushed to the brink by McDonald's. Just asked anyone who's ever tried to get breakfast at 10:33 a.m.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I didn't know that. I certainly didn't know that. I'm pissed! I drove past a 24-hour McDonald's at about 4AM (after driving the wrong way on the Garden State Parkway listing to Boyz II Men's "End of the Road" over and over and over again, then finally realizing my mistake and turning around, by the time I hit my right exit in the right direction I was starved! And there was that McDonald's). But I thought: "4am? There's no way they're serving breakfast yet. They've got to still be on midnight dinners."

    I could have had a fluffy bacon egg and cheese biscuit meal plus a bacon egg and cheese McGriddle. That's what I wanted.

    Damn.

    Your regrets will haunt you if you let them.

    ReplyDelete
  4. So on the smoking gun, if they show your arrest report they black out your D.O.B. but not your weight?

    That's randomly considerate of them.

    ReplyDelete
  5. pregnancy .&.cravings... blame it on the hormonal inbalance..

    ReplyDelete
  6. Not full time crazy, just pregnancy crazy...I love it.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Amanda couldn't of said it best.. "Stockplie McNuggets..?"
    :)
    *Followed*

    ReplyDelete
  8. HAHA...LMAO. Great post!
    For the record, I was never a crazy bitch when I was pregnant.

    About the only time in my life that I wasn't;)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Sarah P - I totally agree. And I when I murder someone, will you be my lawyer?

    Kim - I get angry just thinking about it. I once pulled up to the speaker and AS I started ordering, they turned the menu from breakfast to lunch!

    Dogimo - you got that right - those regrets WILL haunt you. Especially if they involve listening to Boyz II Men repeatedly.

    And yeah, I would rather it be the other way around, but I'm fat, so I guess everyone would have their own preference.

    Aynzan - yup!

    Amanda - thanks! *blush*

    Hovito89 - They are one of the many things I stockpile.

    Christine - Then I am crazy-pregnancy-bitch enough for the both of us!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Curious, though, how similar crazy mother strength is to PCP strength. Not that I'm ruling against this lady. A craving is a craving is a craving, as Gertrude Stein would have written if she had ever been pregnant. Which I'm pretty sure she wasn't. 'cause, I mean, dude, lesbians for the win.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I remember seeing this on the news and thinking, jeez she must really like nuggets!! But now that you have pointed this out, it all makes sense.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I remember seeing this on the news and thinking, jeez she must really like nuggets!! But now that you have pointed this out, it all makes sense.

    ReplyDelete

Every time you leave me a comment, an angel earns its wings.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...